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Topic: Been ask to do a Good friends Gig behind his back - Page: 1

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jimmy bPRO InfinityMember since 2007
Been ask to take over a friends set in another Bar in town. He is a good Vinyl DJ but the new manager does like his style. So he asked me to do it.

I really don't know what to do, As my mate has been a good friend to me for 10 years, and I don't like to stab him in the back, also I'm happy with just doing my 2 gigs on the weekend.

Need advice on what to do.

Jimmy b

 

Posted Thu 03 Jan 08 @ 7:17 am
taylaPRO InfinityMember since 2007
jimmy b

had that same situation in october last year old boss leaving and new one coming in, the guy working the venue was an old friend of mine who had totally lost interest in working the place would only use one finger all night to hit playlist (and you know my feelings about them) then would just wander off and go drink with some punters for the rest of the night

told the new boss to give him his notice before i would even touch the place, after two weeks i took over he got in five new plasmas as well as using five old tv monitors the place is now showing a profit and the customers are lapping it up with all the video stuff i'm doing with vdj

thing is jimmy i should have really told him what the score is and business is business and it would either be me or someone else taking over the venue one way or the other he's out the door, instead of me feeling guilty hes lost his gig.

thinking about it he would have no hesitation of walking in if the boot was on the other foot, hope that helps a bit in your situation

Tayla

 

Posted Thu 03 Jan 08 @ 7:42 am
I think you answered your own question, and in several ways. You stated that you don't want to stab your friend in the back. Then don't. That's what YOU want. (you said it, you mean it right?) You also stated that you are happy with two gigs a week. While I mostly believe that, I can also understand the desire for more.

I think the answer here is easy, talk with your friend about the issue. Maybe he doesn't care too much, maybe that gig is wearing on him... in any case Karma can be a bitch. Don't take a gig from a friend without a consult, it'll bit you on the ass.

Best of luck.
 

Posted Thu 03 Jan 08 @ 8:25 am
That's the problem with this business it's a stab you in the back culture! I have never stolen someone's job and never will, I have never had a job stolen either.

My advice is to tell your friend that the manager offered you the job. And that you said no because your a friend.

You and I are both from the UK I'm a northerner, I have no idea were your from or what it's like were you are, DJ wise. But we don't tolerate any funny business anymore, it was myself that brought about the change and I'm glad i did.

It all started about 8 years ago when I employed a new DJ for a NYE gig, right up until the day before NYE the guy was fine, no problems! he then went on to let me down by not turning up and by not giving me notice so that I could make alt arrangements and book someone else, the lie's that he told afterwards were dispicable - kids in hospital, I found out he had sold me out! but now it was different! it was about his lie about his kid's been in hospital that I felt that something had to be done about him and it was.

From then on afterwards the violence continued should anyone step out of line, we now have no cowboy's in our area only people that have respect for each other it couldn't be better.

We still keep an eye out for trouble and deal with it accordingly.

PEACE!!!
 

Posted Thu 03 Jan 08 @ 9:41 am
jimmy bPRO InfinityMember since 2007

Cheers lads,

I've decided to meet up with my mate tonight and have a few pints with him and tell him what I've told you guys.

I'm really shitting myself because he was the one that I learnt from, where I moved with the times and embraced technology, he still loves his vinyl.

It's a tough one for me as I don't like confrontation. Will we still be friends I don't know.

I hope so.

Jimmy b

 

Posted Thu 03 Jan 08 @ 10:42 am
taylaPRO InfinityMember since 2007
CHARLIE

so am i reading this right, your basically running a cartel down your way, a bit of a closed shop if any venue owner or manager wants to bring in a new guy he's got to run it by the local dj overlords first,

instead of letting him get it wrong then him coming back cap in hand asking forgiveness for his stupidity and you's charging him extra per night, sounds a bit like the problems we had on the doors up here years ago but there was a lot more at stake then just being under charged by a scrawny kid who only wants a bit of the lime light.

good owners/managers stick with us professionals and are willing to pay extra, which is what i brought to the table for this new bar manager/tenant (not forgetting he came to me and he had already made up his mind the current dj was out the door) in professnalism and experience, is reflected in the fee i receive being three times as much as the previous guy plus whatever i want to drink all night, which i never abuse

which brings me to the question do you only work at new venues or have you replaced your fellow djs working in an existing venue?

so i would'nt worry about someone coming in under cutting, in the end it costs the bar more to get your services back, that is if you would want to go back, i wouldn't, let the shit sink...lol


Tayla




 

Posted Thu 03 Jan 08 @ 11:05 am
taylaPRO InfinityMember since 2007
jimmy

i think your doing the right thing, and what you've just said he sounds professional enough to take it the way it is, he'll be disappointed naturally
who would'nt, he'll probably buy you a drink, tell you he let it slip, and give you best wishes, before getting charlies mates to come round... lol

Tayla

 

Posted Thu 03 Jan 08 @ 11:13 am
jimmy bPRO InfinityMember since 2007
Thanks dad...Hehe

The Manchester massive might come and sort me out, lol

Getting ready now. Will tell you how it went later.

Jimmy b

 

Posted Thu 03 Jan 08 @ 11:17 am
Very funny:)
 

Posted Thu 03 Jan 08 @ 11:20 am
taylaPRO InfinityMember since 2007
hey jimmy

you maybe using that appointment sooner than you think... only kidding, Dad!!! i'll be calling on charlie before your x mate, hehe


Tayla


 

Posted Thu 03 Jan 08 @ 11:36 am
This is how I got my Saturday job. The guy that I was helping out the scheduling was a playlister. So when I came in to fill the gaps. I payed attention to the crowd. During the whole year I was there the staff and some management would tell me that I should take over fulltime. I didn't feel good about stabbing in the back. Until, he sub leased some events (3) and left me high and dry on some eqp that was supposed to be there and working properly but wasn't. Almost a year to the date the venue started asking me questions if I was contracted by this person and things like that. One day I got the phone call and I took the job over the phone and started the next show.

The crazy thing about all this is the fact that the former DJ met with me a month before and was trying to sell me his gigs for 10,000 and he would fade out of the picture slowly so no one was the wiser. He said that he was moving out of town back home and he wanted to get a little something in return before he moved. I considered idea of paying out 10,000 that was already on the books with a potential to make 100,000 by the end of the year. I did not trust this guy after a while and so I took his highest paying gig and found out that he was lying to me the whole time anyway. I questioned every venue he was at and I could have taken his shows anyway because he did not have a good reputation. Don't get me wrong, he was good but was not very professional with his venues.

The moral is: Trust your instincts
 

Posted Thu 03 Jan 08 @ 11:57 am
taylaPRO InfinityMember since 2007
by the way jimmy is this the same guy that was trying to screw a regular gig just because of the time of year? if it is then you have got nothing to feel guilty about

the management have seen him for what he is, they fill his pockets throughout the year and this is how he repaid them, fault is squarely on his shoulders

Tayla


 

Posted Thu 03 Jan 08 @ 12:24 pm
You guys are funny, and this is how I see it. I have to eat, need a place to stay, an auto to drive, keep up with my music, and like nice stuff. In order to get this, I need money. There are other alternatives (I have tried a few), but doing an honest days work, is the only way to go. This is just like any other business. An owner has every right to hire who he sees fit, even if it's an idiot. What is this "stabbing in the back bullshit", the guy offered you a job, you take it if you like the terms. It has nothing to do with you and your friend. He does not like your friend, and he will be out of a job whether you take it or not. Only whiners use the term "stabbed me in the back", even if it is true, you should have been looking. Ever heard the terms "protect yourself at all times" and "watch your back"?

Say your friend got you a job at Microsoft. You work hard, and start getting promotions. Your friend, just shows up everyday, and does as little as possible. You go to school and get your masters, and are offered a position that is on the same level as your friends, and take it. Next year, they offer you a job, and your friend will report to you. Do you take it? I can't believe I even asked that question.

What are you supposed to do, only give half an effort? The only reason I am in this club so long, is because I work harder than any of the guys that want my job. My owner hates me and the fact I make more than twice what he pays these other so called DJs, he has hired. My favorite words to him are,"These guys can't carry my headphones", and I mean that in the harshest terms.

I have taken jobs that were offered to me, that my best friend had, and from other DJs that I knew. I have also given jobs to my best friend, and other DJs that I know. This is business, and I am able to separate that from my friendship.

You have no obligation to your friend. You can however, give him the courtesy, of a face to face talk to let him know what is going on. There is a difference.
 

Posted Thu 03 Jan 08 @ 1:23 pm
This type of thing has happend a couple of times with me. I had a club that wanted to get rid of me because the manager did not like how much the owner was paying me, but my boy told them no. I recently just started 2 new clubs on thursday and friday that I took from other people. I did not know the people well, but I figure it happens. These 2 guys were not playing to the crowd, and oviously they did not care anymore. They did themselves in. I am now making good money and will continue to through the summer. I live in a seasonal town and it is hard to get jobs during the winter. By the way I also had 2 gigs taken out from under me this past summer, I have also been on the other end of it.
 

Posted Thu 03 Jan 08 @ 2:19 pm
bagpussPRO InfinityMember since 2003
Well most jobs come and go in life, and so do most friends. You've got to decide which is the most important, either way be honest.

Also remember that DJ'ing is an on-going temporary job, the nature of it isn't nice, but some managers are willing to sign contracts, and with that comes obligations in your favour.
 

Posted Thu 03 Jan 08 @ 2:25 pm
jimmy bPRO InfinityMember since 2007
AMaHM

I get what you are saying, but friendship means alot to me ( probably more than business ) business chances come and go but good friendship is hard to find.

I've just get back from having a drink with my mate and told him that I have been offered his gig, he was not that surprised. He told me that him and his wife are moving to a new place to live which is about 25miles away ( Grantham ) if you know the UK, and that he would be given up his gig anyway. He wants settle down and start a family.

What he said to me, and I was quite moved about it, was that he was planning to tell the Manager to take me on to fill his place.

All in all it was a pleasant couple of hours

Jimmy b

 

Posted Thu 03 Jan 08 @ 2:36 pm
Glad to hear that it worked out, I wish it was that easy all of the time.
 

Posted Thu 03 Jan 08 @ 2:40 pm
Tear Em 'UpPRO InfinitySenior ModeratorMember since 2006
Jimmy....here is what I always tell my friends. Friends are friends.....business is business. The two cannot co-exist unless ground rules are set. Rule Number 1. My prices are my prices, don't haggle with me. No. 2. If a friend is bidding the same jobs as me, or if its a stranger, my response when their names are brought up is always the same "Never heard them live, I hope they do a good show, or you can go with me and I KNOW I'll do a good show". No. 3. If a customer wants me over my friend, sorry bro..friends are friends...you know the rest.

But all of my DJ friends know these are my feelings on this because I am up front about it. So if their feelings are hurt, at least I have the comfort in my knowledge I did not hide anything from them. So please talk to you friend, tell him what happened and tell him your feelings. And tell him how you intend to handle it, should the same thing happen, in the future.

Just be honest and upfront and you'll be just fine Jimmy.

T
 

Posted Thu 03 Jan 08 @ 2:42 pm
jimmy b wrote :

What he said to me, and I was quite moved about it, was that he was planning to tell the Manager to take me on to fill his place.


Now this is what real friends do! It's not what you know in this game, it's who!
 

Posted Thu 03 Jan 08 @ 2:53 pm
taylaPRO InfinityMember since 2007
jimmy

can i just this once, please please let me say it, TOLD YOU SO... nice to hear everything is still cushty with you and your mate


Tayla


 

Posted Thu 03 Jan 08 @ 2:59 pm
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